I'm tired of wasting my life in my room. I don't really know what to do, though. I haven't been out of the home for weeks. I've been outside, just not really off the property. I talk to people all day, and I'm social, but not in person. What I need is the sun, and people that haven't or will cease to disturb me emotionally. I need to go on a hike with someone, or someones. Maybe I'll finally call back Alexis, and call Cody. I'm sure they'd be more than happy to go, if they're not busy.

It'd probably also be a really good idea to go to the doctor as soon as possible... but I'm having a huge problem having the courage to do that. It'd probably do well to fix almost all my problems. An added problem I've been having lately is sleeping until 2-4:00 pm after not being able to sleep until 7:00 am. Just check the time of this post. I'm not really tired at all.

Fix me, somehow.

listening to: Wilco - Sky Blue Sky

Today was a rather good day. Very good, actually. It started out with me waking up from the second 'nightmare' I suppose one would call it. I'll explain the nightmare(s) in detail below. After I woke up I went straight to my computer as usual and started talking to my mate Vicky who was free to play Neverwinter Nights for a few hours. I'm building a SAUCEROR that you see above. I love playing a sorcerer, mostly because I can cast powerful skills over and over. Wizards have to rest far more, but they can learn more skills. That kick ass helm he has on comes from a boss Vic and I killed today. Fun it was.

While I was playing I noticed my phone vibrate, I new voice mail. As I went to check the voice mail I found that for some reason our service was dead. No outgoing calls. I more or less knew who it was, though. Cody had asked me earlier on myspace about hanging out with him today, so eventually I was able to call him back on my house phone and set a time, etc. It was a nice day out, if a little warm, so we swam in Mindy's pool with her brother and sister. We then dried off and headed upstairs to watch Team America. Very funny movie. "America, fuck yeah!" (hehhehehe) When the movie ended we played Guitar Hero for a few minutes and then headed home.

Now for the strange dreams I've been having; I'll start with the first one:

Jared Buist
Psycho With Crazy Piercings
(yes, I'm giving them titles)

This one was really weird, though short. It all starts out, and mostly ends with Jared Buist, who I've known for ages, with many, many piercings. No shirt and very different looking. It didn't look like Jared, but it was. My mind told me it was him. It felt like he was coming for me. For what reason I do not know. His peculiar piercings included a pair from his nipples with a chain connecting them. Similar were his nose and ear piercings, connecting chain and all. He also had miscellaneous gear on him that looked frighteningly similar to bondage gear.

I'm really quite glad that dream didn't go anywhere; for what could have happened I dare not divulge.

Bad Parents

A bit longer this one, as well as more nerve wrecking. It began strangely, but pleasant. I was driving around in our Volkswagen when I became hungry. I was in an unfamiliar area, had a very 1984 feel to it, this town. Slowing the car to a stop I entered to the nearest house without introducing myself. None were home but an adult, who seemed the mother. Strangely there was a barbecue inside the house. Not thinking anything of it at the time I took a bit of chicken from the flames and indulged. I took a look around while eating my lunch to see what was going on with this house.

Now after here it got a bit blurry for me, I'll try to explain as best I can, though.

There seemed to be some kind of abuse going on, to young children. Here is the blurry part... After doing something I had children in my van heading back to my house. These children weren't just random dream children, they were my nephew Elijah and someone else who strangely didn't turn up in the rest of the dream. Something was very wrong with Elijah... He was very calm but also very worried and afraid of what was going on. My attempts to calm did nothing, and I had a strong feeling that no matter what I did something very bad was happening, and I couldn't stop it.

At this point I bailed myself out of the dream. I didn't want to know any more.

listening to: The Beatles

I am so booooored. This last week I haven't done anything at all. NOTHING. Unless you count farming in Guild Wars all day every day to get your Holy Lightbringer title something. It really is nothing, though. I told myself on Monday that I was going to go out and talk to Wal-Mart people to get a job. That obviously never happened. It's Monday again! Late Sunday night, anyway. I'd like to do something tomorrow (today) but I don't really have the motivation to go do anything. I don't care. I don't mean to not care, it just happens. Maybe I'll call someone, or create confrontation with strangers! That sounds fun, if I wasn't afraid of strangers. I'll create confrontation on the internet. That's the best place to do it, after all. I could ask people on the LDS.org chat if they want sex with an old man, and pretend to have a fetish for stinky feet. That would rule. I wonder if they still have a chat room setup on their site... If not I'm sure I can find LDS groups chatting openly on the internet somewhere.

Also, my class is graduating on the 24th of this month. I'm thinking of attending, but I dunno. If someone comes with me I might.

listening to: Iron and Wine - Our Endless Numbered Days

listening to: Nine Inch Nails - With Teeth