Shiit, my 40th post. Or is "over the hill" 50? I think it is. Oh well, I'm still calling my blog "over the hill."

Today was shitty. Really shitty. I did get paid the other night though which was nice. It wasn't the biggest check at $330.something, but I'll deal. It gave me enough to see how bad Daniel Radcliffe really is. His little friend's are pretty bad too, even though I want to lay Emma Watson. That movie sucked. Oh, yeah, back to my shitty day. There wasn't much to it. Other than being in a HORRIBLE mood at work. I kept wanting to use my box-cutter the way it was meant to be used, on my ARM. I didn't, though. I just brooded all day. Mary Ann was nice to me at lunch though, cheered me up slightly it did. (Mary Ann is my dept. manager). I then realized how close to finished we were for the day. It cheered me up a bit more. I think by 4:00 AM I was feeling OK. Guh, excuse the rambling, I'm tired.

The reason I was upset, I think, was because I felt very alone. Not at work, but in life generally. I just don't have anyone to talk to, or be around anymore. The people that I would like to be around, I'm afraid of talking to; or, at least, beginning to talk to. I think I'd be fine if the ice was broken. I guess I haven't really had anyone to be around since being a Jr. in high school, though. It was fine before, but now it's really starting to hurt. Sigh.

I think I'll be hanging out with someone this weekend. Nervous as fuck for that, though. That isn't surprising at all though, seeing as I haven't hung out with someone I don't know very well for... two years. *loner*

listening to: Muse - Black Holes and Revelations